Joined Aug 2006
L8: Grand Teacher
Forum Thread
Dear Neighbor
June 11, 2008 at
11:11 AM
in
Question
Complete this sentence with what you want to say to your neighbor, but won't.
Here is mine: Dear Neighbor, if we don't answer the phone please don't drive down here to see if we are home. We are, we are just ditching you due to your constant neediness.
Here is mine: Dear Neighbor, if we don't answer the phone please don't drive down here to see if we are home. We are, we are just ditching you due to your constant neediness.
855 Comments
Your comment cannot be blank.
Sign up for a Slickdeals account to remove this ad.
Thanks for helping me move and spread the 6 yards of mulch that I got last year...are you about ready for the 10 or so that I need delivered this year?
Dear other neighbor,
I really missed having you plow my driveway this past winter...and the one before that. You did get me spoiled a few winters ago when you so kindly plowed the driveway and both long sidewalks. I hope I didn't do something to piss you off...such as the time I had to ask your MS aged son to stop blowing off fireworks right next to my house when it got to be 11:00 at night and I had to get up at 4:30 the next morning. Oh well...thanks for the past.
I know you must be excited that you have just moved in this week but the lawn and parking lot are not yours to leave your bikes laying around. If that damn bike is STILL in the same spot tomorrow I swear I am putting it in the dumpster.
When I don't answer the door when you come over and pound on it at 11 o'clock please do not assume it's okay to open up the garage, borrow the weed wacker and begin weed wacking your yard. I have insomnia and haven't slept well the past three night. Thanks.
I do not need to know the intimate details of your vagina, no matter how many problems you've had. I don't want to know all the methods you and your husband tried to get pregnant both times or the tricks you used to have a boy then a girl. Also, if you see my car home and try calling, if I don't answer, don't call the cell phone when you are standing on my porch so you can hear if I am home or not.
And, keep your kid in your own backyard. Just because he likes our toys better and we have a bigger backyard does not mean it is a local park. I don't want to be cooking supper and look in my backyard to see your son playing with stuff. It's not ok.
Oh, and if your husband is set on planting azalias from your fence to the sidewalk...be sure to plant them on your side because I will be cutting my side off so I can open my car door without being in a plant.
Please to remove your kids bikes and toys from the yard every morning. Yes we do share a drive, and taking 5 minutes out of every morning to ensure a clear path to the road is getting a bit monotonous.
oh wait...we are supposed to type what we would NOt say...hrmm.
Bike/Spandex shorts are not in style. Especially for a man, which we are still unsure if you are one.
Sign up for a Slickdeals account to remove this ad.
I wish your name were Prudence.
xoxo Drio
WTF is with the sago palms? You have just left the FOURTH one on my doorstep. You will notice I haven't planted the first three yet. Where am I supposed to out these things? Are you trying to tell me something?
You wear so much f*cking cologne that I am choking. One or two sprays in the morning should be sufficient, so kindly disconnect the tank you had installed so that you could bathe and shower in the stuff. And I liked Obsession in 1991, not so much anymore. kthnxbye
Dear Neighbor,
OK Seriously, WTF? You have a 3 bedroom house and have two adult males, three adult females and 2 kids living there. How does that work? I understand polygamy but I had no idea Asians were into that.
And for the guy next door.
Dear Neighbor,
You are a very nice guy, have two very nice cars, a beautiful wife, and a cute baby. However, if you ever want to switch teams, I am just next door.
Please do not come and bring your Imaginary friend, PRESIDENT NIXON over,And knock on my door to see If I have gotten My new lungs yet!
I haven,t!
TRUE STORY! Daily advent-
dear neighbor,
i know you're gay and an actor so you'd be cool to hang out with. wanna introduce me to some famous people?
How you doin? Give me a call sometime.
You're very nice and I realize you and the other moms on the block are stuck at home all day with little kids. But that doesn't mean I have the time to stand out in the street with all of you and gossip for 30 minutes to an hour at a stretch. Some of us just don't have the time.
Sign up for a Slickdeals account to remove this ad.
Please pay your assessment like the rest of us. If you need help contact the condo board for a payment plan. The more of you that default on payments the more the Association goes into dept. In turn, this eventually will effect all of our property values.